Keeping your enemy too close

I just finished watching the extremely long-winded finale of "The Biggest Loser," and I must say that it caused me to rethink grabbing some chocolate chips for dessert. I will openly admit that my goal is to turn over a new leaf in that department, and start anew in a city where walking is the primary mode of transportion. The hills in Seattle are comparable to those in San Francisco, which could lead to a quarter-bouncing ass. At some point.

I actually used to be skinny as a kid. My story is that I started filling out in puberty and didn't stop, and I've always had difficulty with my weight. I'm one of those (like many of you) that should exercise four times a week, drink 64 oz. of water a day and make veggies my new best friend. I don't drink very often, I don't smoke, and I don't take rec drugs, but I turn to food for my comfort. It is, indeed, my Achilles Heel.

One of my biggest obstacles is that I just don't like healthy food. I think it's a given that junk food tastes great, but I'm such a picky eater that it's difficult for me to find alternatives that I can tolerate and actually keep down. I'm also not one that can just cut way back on portions because I've done that in the past -- and literally fainted in public.

I know it comes down to just getting my mind on it and sticking with it. I think back to some of the things I've gone through and losing weight should be a piece of cake, right? Perhaps the difference is that the other things just happen, usually without any notice or control, whereas weight loss presents itself as a choice and a hassle.

After all, if my dog with a bad leg that makes him scared to step over door thresholds can suddenly leap off a couch to chase a cat, then I should be able to get my brain in gear to accomplish one of my top goals that I have yet to achieve.

So let it be said, so let it be written, so let it be done.

No double dipping

I spent much of the holiday weekend catching up on various movie releases and was quite pleased that all were pretty good, after such a dull year so far. One of them was the Johnny Cash biopic, Walk the Line.

While I enjoyed the movie overall, one of the difficulties I had watching this movie (and others) is when a main character -- that is married -- pines for another and we're supposed to somehow "rally" around this love that is "meant to be." I couldn't help but think, like when I watched Ray, about how the poor wives, who married their husbands when they were nobodies, were back at home with the kids.

I honestly don't know if I'm alone with this one, but I have a hard time watching movies where the primarily plot point is to break up a couple that is married or engaged. I was even turned off by watching America's Sweetheart, Julia Roberts, try to break up her friend's engagement in My Best Friend's Wedding. While I realized that she didn't get him in the end, I never wanted her to at any point in the film.

I could go on with many examples, but I think you get the gist already. It's just a challenge for me to watch any kind of a film and care about the character when I can't respect him/her (and even more so when it's based upon actual events). Is that really unusual or can most of you just let it go for the sake of entertainment?

Island hopping

I know you were all anxiously awaiting to hear about my day trip to Lana'i, especially since I'm convinced I grew a set. Just go with me on that.

You can see where I currently live, on Oahu (yes, where Honolulu is), and how close it is to Lana'i. I think we were in the air for about 20 minutes total.

The island of Lana'i has about 2,500 residents, most of which live in Lana'i City, with some of the rich folks living near the beach resorts. The island is about 18 miles x 8 miles, and it used to be covered in pineapples, though now it's economy is driven by the two resorts.

Between Dan and I, I think there are enough pictures to get the general idea of what the island of Lana'i is like.

This is, by far, the smallest airport I've ever been to. We didn't even see any sign of civilization as we approached the runway. This is the entire airport. And oddly, they have about eight TSA employees working the one security belt for five flights a day that seat about 35 people.




This was the first of a few roads we were actually able to take around the island. I hadn't realized how much of it was unreachable, and even then, most of the roads aren't paved so you have to 4 x 4 in a Jeep Wrangler.

Look closely, that is actually a ship you see beached in the shallow coastal waters. Right after WW2, the Navy tried to sink the ship, but couldn't (how odd is that?), so they parked this baby off the coast of a fairly remote island.



This area is called Garden of the Gods, and there were about five or so trails that you could drive off of, though two of them were deemed as "off limits." See all the red dirt (the next picture is even better)? Well, as I was driving along and oftentimes, fish-tailing in the dirt, the dust billowed in and eventually left a film all over my face and khaki pants. Later that night, I even Q-tipped red dirt out of my ears. Nice, huh?





We're not really sure who went through this entire area and placed the rocks on top of each other, but I have to tell you that at some points, it felt like people were staring down at you.










View from the end of one of those paths that started within the Garden of the Gods. I believe that's Moloka'i in the backdrop.











This is what I was referring to where I said that I grew my own "set." As in, male driving balls. In looking at the pic now, it does not appear as nerve-wracking as it was in-person. Even though we said on our way down, "oh this will be fun on the way up," it turned out to be more of a baby hill compared to what came ahead. But, we just didn't grab the camera for those.

This was the first time I'd really ever driven on these kinds of roads before, so the first couple of fishtails and undercarriage crunches made me flinch, but then I got used to them. Dan said he was most impressed with my driving skills and even shot video coming up this hill and another one, but upon looking at them, it was so jostly (yes, that's my word) that you see more of Dan's leg than anything. He described it as our Blair Witch video, but I have to admit that I got a little distracted by my arm flabbing about, so we'll stick with still shots instead. If you haven't done this before, I would highly recommend it, though I would have felt much more at-ease with my own vehicle than a rental car, especially given the waiver they made me sign.

And now we have green. I liked this shot of the forest, as it kind of reminded me of that Forbidden Forest (or whatever the name was) in The Princess Bride. I also like the way the clouds are lightly kissing the tree tops, almost teasing them. I was surprised to see so many different types of lanscaping, from this forest to red dust to regular beaches to driving through clouds on top of the hills.





Taken down another one of the roads close to the Four Seasons resort that's by the beach. I love drop-off cliffs like this, which is one reason I'm determined to roam the Ireland and Scottish countrysides one day.

So...we did all this and ate breakfast in course of about five hours, if you can believe, and wound up taking an earlier flight back. Because we literally had nothing else to do. All in all, I'm glad I went, just to say that I've been before, but I don't think I'd need to go back. It was a little too remote for me.

Thanks to everyone who participated in the movie trivia yesterday. Nicole actually posted all ten correct answers in a tag-team effort with her husband, TJ, so you can go back to her comment for the answer key. Assuming Yellojkt really answered his eight correctly, he's the winningest individual, while my namesake of Becky Mae (she doesn't really go by Becky Mae, but it's just to make it less confusing) is the individual who posted the most guesses correctly. The interesting part for me was seeing some of you lurkers drop a comment or those who might not have been by in a while.

Things are officially counting down over here in paradise, for I closed on my place here today (whew!) and booked my ticket to leave next Wednesday afternoon for Seattle. Insert Dukes of Hazzard "Yeeeeeeeeee-hahhhhhhhh!"

And, uh, yeah. Could Lost have been any more anti-climactic? Once you televise your major plot twist in a spot that airs every 10 minutes on your channel, it's not hard to figure out who it was probably going to be....

One sword; two edges

My girlfriends and I were talking the other day about how the dynamic of dating seems to be different nowadays, or maybe we're just getting too old to put up with it. That would be the concept that "no means no." And, I'm not referring to the context of those PSAs from when we were teenagers, but in just about every other aspect.

There's a trend going around for either this era or my age group in that asking for either booty calls or dates a multitude of times will eventually garner a "yes." Although the first five times yielded a "no," then suddenly the sixth is the magic number? Or, my favorite was being told how straight-forward I am and how refreshing it is that I don't play games, yet apparently doesn't apply when I say "no" to him.

See here's the thing: if a guy wants a woman that is independent and has a brain, then she is going to be one who says what she means and no "convincing" is really necessary. It's the same as the guys' side: if we're into you, we will let you know as easily as you let us.

It's unnerving because when we say "no" and it's discounted, it means we don't now what the guy's limitations are. If he disregards this, imagine what it could escalate to? Granted, it doesn't necessarily mean the guy is a Ted Bundy, but if we start to ignore our gut instinct, then that is when we become vulnerable and get ourselves into situations that really may be more serious. Because the truth is, you just never know. We don't want to take that chance. And, more importantly, we shouldn't have to.

The more mellow side of the concern when the "no" is ignored is that it becomes one of those red flags that he expects things to always go his way; to be on his terms without any regard or concern to what she wants. And to someone that is independent and has a brain, it will clash like oil and water. You get the cheek; don't go back for the lips. You're told he/she isn't interested; respect that and be friends. Your offer for casual sex is declined; don't bring it up again.

I said the other day that I think the female gender is unfairly stereotyped because I hear many of my male friends accuse women of becoming psychos and/or needy, when in reality, men are just as capable of demonstrating these very behaviors. My friend pointed out that perhaps it's because women haven't had their voices heard because our media and entertainment reflects a male-dominated Hollywood. Then, it occurred to me that it's probably another reason why Sex and the City was so popular -- because women were finally getting their stories out there to show that men can be just as bizarre.

Our personal boundaries (both emotional and physical) are one of the few areas over which each of us has complete control of access rights. To cross over without permission is a huge violation and an indication of the other person's character, and while I'm sure some may disagree, I have yet to be proved wrong this particular issue.