Pride & Too Much Prejudice?

I always liked the quote from Pretty Woman when Julia Roberts tells Richard Gere that “the bad stuff is easier to believe.” I don’t think there’s any question that most of us are hesitant to accept compliments for face value; there’s always a question lingering of what the person really wants.

Even as I read blogs or listen to friends, we are all so quick to self-deprecate and make jokes about our weaknesses and flaws as if it somehow makes us more human, less threatening, more likable, or all of the above. Why are so hesitant to say nice things about ourselves and be proud of what we have accomplished? And conversely, why do we seem so quick to respond negatively to those that do?

In the blogosphere, part of me wonders if it’s because blogs have been notorious as a way for the blogger to vent out some frustration, anger, grief, depression, sadness, etc. and this particular medium doesn’t seem to be as suited (or liked) for emotions of a happier nature? Memes seem to be get-out-of-jail free cards to say something nice about yourself and not worry about repercussions. Even for this post, I felt obligated to someone if I would sound like an ass by saying that facialist have said I have nice skin before I published it.

I think we often hesitate to talk about the good times because we’re worried about offending others, making them feel uncomfortable or coming across as egotistical. And I’m not talking about people who think they’re better than everyone else in every possible way, but people who are simply content, or excited to be genuinely complimented, or happen to mention that they have an asset, instead of thinking everything about them is worthless.

It reminds me of an episode in Sex and the City (as most life’s lessons do), where Miranda went out with a guy who talked most of the time on the first date. On the second date, she felt comfortable and mentioned how much she enjoyed her job, her life, etc. Not once did she make the comparison to anyone else, but the guy told her later on that he didn’t want to go out with her again because she seemed so “full of herself.”

Why does expression of happiness or confidence often equate to conceit?

"Vanity and pride are different things, though the words are often used synonymously. A person may be proud without being vain. Pride relates more to our opinion of ourselves; vanity, to what we would have others think of us." Jane Austen

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Wait, I'm not done yet. My brother-in-law (let's call him Leo), is stationed in Iraq until next January. Prior to his deployment, he was given a bobble head (I think it's a St. Louis Cardinal player) and Leo has started a blog to document Hungo's secretive whereabouts on this journey called Where is Hungo? I wanted to post the link to get Leo and Hungo some new readers. Leo is a great BIL, has a great sense of humor and I look forward to seeing what he has the balls to post.

No, I'm still not done! Please go on over and wish Ben from TGIF Hounds a HAPPY FRICKIN' BIRTHDAY (it's Tuesday)! Ben used to blog as the Curator, but shut that site down and due to popular demand, brought back a site primarily dedicated to the antics of his two basset hounds (yes, apparently some dogs really do eat tortillas). Remember how much you loved well wishes on your b-day, so go spread the love!