HE Said/She Said

I was chatting with one of my fellow bloggers not too long ago. I asked him if I could use the story, and he said I could as long as I use an alias. Feeling a bit sassy, I looked his name up on a porn name generator and Bone Samples spat out, so I'm going to use it.

The first time Bone Samples chatted me up, he said he liked IMing b/c he could meet new people, even females, and it wouldn't cause problems with his wife, since, after all you don't meet. I told him that I've learned that blog parties go on all the time where you meet up and you just include your spouses. But, that's not really entertaining to talk about, is it?

My other response was that it is usually a good compromise as long as you don't start engaging in cybersex. After reassuring Bone Samples that I didn't think he was perving on me and this was merely a philosophical discussion, he relaxed. Let's be frank, if you're going to IM, it's got to be about the good stuff, like Ed telling me that he found a TV movie where boy bands became zombies (I became a fan of his after a zombie post).

How's that for a tangent? Let me get back.

Basically what it came down to is whether cybersex is considered cheating when you're in a committed relationship. Bone Samples (does that crack you up as much as it does me?) thinks that as long as it stays online, and the two never meet up or even talk on the phone, then it's not really crossing the line. At first he said it was like watching porn, to which I quickly pointed out that watching porn is not interactive. He then said it was like calling a sex line or going to a strip club and getting a lap dance.

I retorted that it almost seemed like we were going strictly down the gender lines, and I thought most women would find it offensive that their man had to go to another woman, even online, to get his thrills. I consider cybersex different b/c with a sex line operator or stripper, providing that excitement is just a job for them. They could care less who their customer is -- it remains one- sided. However, cybersex with some random chick is someone who is actively participating in the process, and it is a mutually beneficial situation. Plus, she's a real person with real feelings that could actually show up on your door step and/or boil your kid's rabbit.

What do you think?

And since I know you're wondering, considering his stance on this issue, Bone Samples has not perved on me in any way whatsoever. I got the feeling that even though he theoretically didn't think it was cheating, it was still not something he would do.