You say it like it's a bad thing*

Someone asked me once why I would write the movie reviews for a website called MaliciousBitch.com. I had to chuckle a bit because, of course, the question was asked by a man. A man who has never and could never be labeled a “bitch.”

Two of my blog and now real-life buddies, Chris and Doyle, run the site. Just to provide an extremely brief history, the name originated from a woman calling Chris a “malicious bitch” because Chris was seeking to be paid for some work she’d done for this woman, and said she’d go through legal means if necessary. What nerve Chris had, right?

I know that I’ve been labeled a “bitch” many times, either to my face or behind my back. It’s a badge awarded to many women that aren’t afraid to express their opinions or stand up for themselves. And, I’m guessing that many of you out there are sitting there nodding your heads in agreement because you know of what I speak.

Don’t get me wrong, there’s a difference between being tenacious and disrespectful. Do not confuse the two. The woman who dumps on you is rude; the woman who calls her out on it is not. If I'm overcharged for something, I insist upon getting my money back. If someone jumps over my friend Dan D. while he's in his wheelchair, I tell that person he needs better manners.

There’s definitely a double standard when it comes to being direct, especially in the workplace where I could say something and be called “hot headed” or “close minded” and my male co-worker could make the same point and was listened to. Or, even in a restaurant or store, my experience has been that men seem to have their issues addressed in a far quicker and friendlier tone than women. When a man complains, he is being “reasonable and fair,” whereas a woman is “PMSing or menopausal.”

I’ve long since decided that I’d rather be a “bitch” than a doormat, especially until our culture allows for some type of middle ground.

*Slogan from MBc.