Great novel

I just finished reading "The Wedding"by Nicholas Sparks, who also wrote the book that became my favorite 2004 movie, The Notebook<>. The film is about a man who realizes that after he forgets his 29th wedding anniversary (Dumb Ass) that his wife has fallen out of love with him (rightly so), and tries to figure out a way to earn it back (good luck).

There's no man alive who can honestly say he understands women. It just isn't possible, so there's no use trying. But that doesn't mean you can't love them anyway. And it doesn't mean that you should ever stop doing your best to let them know how important they are to you.

One of my favorite quotes from the book, and yet so true. I don't think there's a greater emptiness than feeling like you don't matter anymore, whether you're a woman or man. I've often wondered if that's why some people might stay in abusive relationships -- because to them, at least having some type of attention is better than none at all.

I can speak on this frustration from personal experience, with this happening with two long-term boyfriends (that word sounds so juvenile, doesn't it?). One in college and one ending just about a year ago. I suppose I find myself in a quagmire in that I'm drawn towards men that are intelligent, independent and somewhat reserved -- which, unfortunately, doesn't always mean they can, want or even know how to make room for me.

This is probably one of the hardest things to do when I wipe the slate clean for each new person coming in to my life -- that fear of becoming invisible. It's fairly easy to spot a Son-of-a-Bitch or Dumb Ass fairly quickly, but it's quite difficult to gauge the complacency potential, esp. when it may happen months or years down the road. I want to be appreciated just as much at the 29th anniversary as the first, though I think that's a fairly normal expectation.

It's a constant struggle between the logical side and the emotional female side where I jump to worst-case scenario, esp. initially when I'm still trying to read them. Sometimes the "confusing" actions can be rationally explained, or he may, indeed, just be a Dumb Ass.

I'll just have to continue using my gut. And YOU, of course.

So, here's another friendly reminder to give your mate (or dog) a hug. I think Reese is starting to run for cover from me (actually, that was just another blatant show-off in that I figured out how to do links in my posts and only have about another 100 things to figure out).